The Greatest Secrets to Balancing Strain and Rest for Optimal Growth

In this episode, Coach Jack, shares insights on personal growth, mindfulness, and mental performance in sports. Students engage with questions about life mottos, burnout, physical limitations, and the impact of past experiences on present actions. The discussion emphasizes the importance of being present, feeling emotions, and understanding the mind's role in growth. Key themes include balancing strain and rest, accepting and reframing limitations, and using intentional reflection for personal development. The episode highlights mindfulness and acceptance as crucial for achieving personal and athletic growth.

Transcript

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Well, what's what's the purpose of doing a lot of the things you do throughout the day? Goodness, I'm done just to get it done. I would argue that at the bottom of the bedrock of most things, it's about growing, right? It's about improving. It's about being better than you were the last time you did it. Correct. How do we how do we actually grow? Is it by improving? Well, yes. How do we learn? The only way to actually grow is through. Through feeling or through thinking. Through feeling. Right? Because thinking is a theory, right? It's a it's a simulation in the mind. It's not very different from a VR headset. Right. If you have a VR headset on and you're playing a video game and you forget you're in the video game, right, just because you think it's real doesn't mean it's really real. No. Does that make sense? So the only real learning and change happens from what you feel right now, and you change the change the way you normally respond to it. Right. So let's say you feel anxious and typically you run away from that anxiousness. Right. In normal situations and you do it over and over and over again. Like the habit mind that we talked about. Okay. And you go go to bed at night and you're reflecting. I don't want to do that anymore. I want to act like I'm confident. Right. I don't want to run away from anxiousness, but is it ever going to change if you don't feel it the next time and change in that moment? No. That's why it affects your everyday life. There's nothing that could be more important than being grounded in the moment, because that's how you grow. Does that make sense? You don't grow from thinking about how you're going to be better. It's about feeling. So does that help your answer at all? Because we learn, too, that the more you're here, the more growth potential you have, right? So I'd argue it affects everything. You can do everything better if you're more present. Is that a good answer? Okay. Is that you ready to move on? Oh, yeah. That was my only question. Okay. What do you got, brother? Okay. You're good. We'll come back to you. Um. What is like your life motto or like a quote you live by my favorite quote. Mm. That's the first thing. Okay, well, this is important. I. Again, what's the difference between memorizing and understanding something? If you memorize it, you don't understand it. Beautiful, right. That's a lot of the problems with how we teach school right now is we're teaching kids to memorize stuff. Not necessarily that they actually know what they're doing or understanding the what works behind it. So I'm not against quotes, but I'd rather have you create your own quotes right, than listen to someone else's quote, because then that means you actually understand something. Does that make sense? Most of the yes, I would say this is my favorite one. That's not by me. Um, it's it's by a man named Jim Elliot. And the quote is he is no fool who gives what he cannot keep and gains what he cannot lose. But listen, listen. Do you? Do you even get what that means? It's a very complicated quote. Okay, but listen, listen. What that means, essentially, is that you're focused on what you actually can keep. And what that means is you're growing yourself, right? If you embody what you're growing. Meaning, I'm taking a quality like, say, I build presents, right? Is that something I can take more of into each moment? I don't lose that. Right. Or when you're growing as a character. Okay. Do you go back to the character you were before? Can you do that? No. You'll always be different. Right. So that's an example of gaining something that you cannot lose. And giving something that you cannot keep is like money, right? Money is a revolving door, right? Do you ever own money? No. It's going in. It's going out. Or material things. Right. These are a lot of things that people chase, and they never get satisfied because they're chasing things that will never be static or solidified. So what I'm saying is focus more on how you relate to the moment. Focus on how you're growing your character, how you can be better in each moment. How you what you bring to the moment is what I try and value. Does that make sense? But essentially, if I could dumb it down, I would say feel now two words. That's what I would say feel now. Is that a good answer? Because again, if you're present, you'll do everything better and you'll grow faster. Cool. What do you got, brother? Are these good so far? Are you guys liking that? We're doing questions because we can. Okay. Um, excuse me for now. I do have one guy. How would you, like, handle like like a like if you're, like, burning out from, like, basketball. That's a great question. So this is also very important. So when we talk about thinking about growing listen if we talk about thinking about growing in a span of time is a very important piece. Yes, you have to strain hard, meaning you work hard and then you have to rest hard, meaning you rest the correct way. Right. Let's say you're resting and you're thinking about all the ways you could be better at basketball. Are you really taking a break mentally from basketball? No. Breaks are an essential piece of growing. Strain. Rest. Strain. Rest. Strain. Rest. Bad is the scientific, proven way to maximize growth. So to answer your question, add more brakes. Brakes can actually get you better. It's not like you can just go overdrive on basketball. There's a or actually I'll draw this. So like there's a peak balance of um not working. And overworking. And so this line represents production. Like that. Right. So you have to find the balance between strain and rest. To have peak performance. But if you're just pushing the gas the entire time, you're not going to be getting better. You're actually making yourself worse. So that's a very, very misunderstood concept. And it's important you don't do that. So I would say let yourself rest. I am not saying though. I would argue that most people at your age right now, and the way society is evolving, more people tend to work not as hard than overwork. So that is also something I would be. I'm not saying don't work. I would argue that most people, the way the phones have made us, the way instant gratification has made us, most people tend to be less working as much as they should towards something, putting effort towards something. Does that answer your question? Okay. What do you got? Um, how do you overcome not being able to do something that's like physically not being able to do something that you want to do. Mhm. So this is really really important. So again we talked about positive thinking right. What does it mean to reframe something. Look at it. Yeah. Okay. But so a lot of people with positive positive thinking, they think they're reframing. But are they accepting the way things are. No. Right. They're just trying to delude themselves. Okay. Um, so one, we have to accept the way it is. We have to understand that we cannot change it. If we could change it, we would change it. But we can't. You the non-acceptance. If you can't get that part down, it'll be a constant struggle. Once you can then accept it, you have to reframe the situation, right? So let's say I'm injured is what we're learning about right now a great opportunity when you're injured to spend more time with the mind. Beautiful opportunity. That's an example of reframing a situation after you've accepted it. And it opens the door to be better than you were before. Maybe you've never experienced. If you would have never gotten injured, you would have never gotten into the mental game, and if you never got into the mental game, you wouldn't have been better in however many years, whatever you're going to be really known for. Does that make sense? So I promise you, there's been a lot of ups and downs in my life, and every single one is perfectly placed to put me where I need to be. Um, and part of that, there's faith in that, right? I can't prove that to anybody. But at the same time, I know it works. And and this building and this company can be proof of that, too. Um, is that helpful? Answer. Okay. What do you got, brother? Uh, do the same things you talk about. Like in here. Translates like other sports. This will translate to every moment in your life. Because. Because again, everything that happens to you is interpreted. Through what? The mind. Everything. Right. So we're talking about how we relate to all situations, right? Does that make sense? Wait, so, did you, uh, know about this when you were in high school? No. No. Mhm. When did you learn about this? Good question. Um, so to give you backstory. So my dad started to close the gate CTG um, in 2015. He passed away in 2019 and I ended up taking over the company. And that's kind of how I got here. We partnered with Brad, who was athlete X factory turned in limitless performance. We've only been open for six months, but when that happened, that's when I. One of the biggest problems for me as a player was always composure and body language and getting over the next play. And I was always the one. I wouldn't let anyone outwork me, essentially, but I still had people that were outperforming me and that really bothered me. And what I was missing was the mental side of the game. But at the same time in my daily life, I needed to understand the mind because I was struggling. And so. that is how I got into it. And I realized, wow, this affects way more than just sports. And I want to touch people as much as I can to have the most effect in changing towards good direction. Um, so that is how a very, very quick overview of how I got here. And I do think that this is the most important thing I will ever be able to give to kids. More than basketball, more than, weights more than. But all of them are important pieces, right? We can't just be completely inward and not spend any time outside. But I'll always believe that it's most important, and I want to spend time on what's most important. Does that make sense? Is that a good answer? Yeah. Okay. Who's up? Uh, how do you get something specific, like, out of your head that you can't stop thinking about? Okay. We brief. We briefly went over this yesterday or Tuesday. Resistance. What is resistance? Not doing something or not being resilient. Mhm. It's important. So resistance is a form of non-acceptance right. So let's say you have a thought or let's say you're meditating. Did anybody meditate. I did for a little bit in school but it was a little difficult. Okay. Yeah. We want to do our. Yes. Um at home probably to start for beginners eventually. Yes. You'll be strong enough to where you can do it. Wherever. Um, sorry. Um, can you say what? I lost my train of thought. Okay. Yeah. So. Resistance. Yep. Yep. So let's say we're meditating and we have a sensation. An itch. Right? And I told you, itch is a great way to get better at meditating. Right? I touched on that a little bit. Right. Let's say because I'm talking about we have to learn how to turn towards uncomfortable feelings, right. Instead of a way when when we're turning away from stuff, we're resisting the way it is. So we're having thoughts that we we don't like, right? Um, and we're trying to push him away. Push him away. Typically that amplifies the problem. Right. Let's say you have an itch and you're really, really focused on not itching it. Is it going to get bigger? Yeah. So you have to turn towards the uncomfortable feeling and say yes to it. There's a there's a really good book. Well Bruce Lee is a great. He's. Do you know who Bruce Lee is? Okay. He's an awesome person to learn from. He was he was big on the mental side of things too. But he was famous for saying be like water, right? When you punch water, what does it do? Well. Look at that. He's right. That's true. That's true. But when you punch water, what does the water do with the punch? It forms with the punch. Right. We can think of, um, resistance as you're punching, and it's. It's not forming with the punch. Does that make sense? So when we have something we don't want, we have to accept it's there and stop the wanting it to be different. Once you stop the wanting it to be different, then that's when it opens the door for you to actually control something. Does that make sense or no? Or can you give me, like a real life example that you're comfortable sharing? Um. Let me think. Does anybody else with this question think of think of a real life example in your life? I know you don't want to. I'm saying, does anybody else have one that they're comfortable sharing? There's something in your mind, whether it's a feeling or a thought, and you want to get rid of it, but you can't. Like, like, uh, like an ex-girlfriend or something. That's good. Right? Okay. The taco truck was shut down, like, around your local neighborhood. So you keep thinking about that. Okay. Um. Again, it's very similar to. It's very similar to this answer. Name one more time. Cooper. Yeah, it's very similar to Cooper's answer. We have to learn to accept it's there. If you're constantly not accepting it, can you ever learn from it? No, because you're not understanding what's there. Right? Listen, listen. It's a huge piece of mindfulness, understanding the cause of what's causing the struggling. Yes. If we're not accepting the thought, we can't truly learn how to understand it. Does that make sense? What are we doing over there again? Okay. Are we good? Do we still want to keep doing questions? Or we'd rather have me talk about other stuff? I like this. Okay. Does that, does that. Um. So stop wanting it to be different is number one. And what's going to help you stop wanting it to be different? We learned yesterday what was a wing of mindfulness. Non non-judgment. Beautiful. You're judging it. I don't like this. Right. This isn't good, right? So if you if you stop judging it and you look at it as it is, you're going to be able to accept it, and then you'll actually be able to let it go. Does that make sense? It's hard. I'm talking in words that'll make more sense if you meditate more. Um, but yeah, not judging will help you because the reason you want it to be different is because you're judging it. Do we get that? And is that huge in basketball? Like with shots or good plays or bad plays? Um, non judging is such a amazing skill that you could pick up on. We good for next question from. Yeah. Got you. Um, I know you said to try to be in the present as much as possible, but could reflecting on the past help you grow better? This is a great question. Great question. Again am I anti thinking. No no no. What am I what am I saying. Is the enemy. When you're lost. In. Well, correct. And the habit mind is being lost, right? So if you're reflecting on the past but you're lost in it, right? You're not deliberately doing it. Then it's an issue, right? But if you sit down and you're present and you intentionally reflect on the past, it can be very helpful. So I'm not saying it's it's, um, an unhelpful thing to go in the past or future. It's unhelpful if you're doing it without intentionally doing it. Don't live in the past. Learn from it. Um. Yeah, I think that's good. You're rooted in the moment, and, you know your mind's going to the past to learn in the moment. That's good. So it's really more like this. This can be a good visualization. So let's say the circle represents the moment and this is the present. This is the past. This is the future okay. But you're aware that it's going on. Does that make sense? But if it's outside the moment and you're lost, this is where we have problems. Because all the all the moments are connected, right? The future is here now. The past is here now. But when we're lost in it, we're not intentionally trying to do it. That's when it causes problems. Does that make sense? Because all the things that happen to you in the future is that drastically affected by the commitments you make in this moment? Yeah. Do we get that? What did I just say? All this stuff is going to happen. The future based on the present. What you do right now. So they're very, very interconnected and they matter. Does does that mean every moment matters? Yeah. Yes. Yes. Yeah. Every single one matters. So everything you do now was based on what you did in the past. Everything you got to do is based on what you do now. Everything is extremely interconnected. Way more than you think. Does that answer your question? Cool.